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Raoul MoatOutta jail, police on his tail

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#41 maryportfuncity

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Posted 12 July 2010 - 06:08 PM

Police suspect that Raoul Moat had dandruff.... they found his head and shoulders in a nearby tree
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#42 welshman

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Posted 12 July 2010 - 06:20 PM

"Troubled Gazza" - perfect
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#43 Windsor

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Posted 12 July 2010 - 06:30 PM

"Troubled Gazza" - perfect


Do you suppose the prospect of being befriended by Gazza was what tipped him over the edge?

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#44 Spade_Cooley

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Posted 12 July 2010 - 06:35 PM

I don't know if anyone has pointed this out yet, but being as Gazza claims to have known Moat from him being a bouncer when Gascoigne himself was at Newcastle, and being as a) Moat was born in 1973 and B) Gazza signed for Spurs in 1988... well.
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#45 Toast

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Posted 12 July 2010 - 07:06 PM

I gather Moat had been instructed in shotgun safety, but it went in one ear and out the other.

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#46 Toast

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Posted 12 July 2010 - 07:11 PM

I don't know if anyone has pointed this out yet, but being as Gazza claims to have known Moat from him being a bouncer when Gascoigne himself was at Newcastle, and being as a) Moat was born in 1973 and B) Gazza signed for Spurs in 1988... well.


That'll just be down to garbled reporting and/or Gazza being pissed and confused. No doubt Gazza continued to frequent Newcastle nightclubs after 1988.

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#47 Windsor

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Posted 13 July 2010 - 02:33 PM

We should post the jokes here.

Seems to be the place to go if you think Moat should have gunned down more 'pigs'.

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#48 maryportfuncity

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Posted 13 July 2010 - 04:12 PM

From the page linked above:


raoul moat isn't the first person to have a famous footballer turn up to show his support.
Peter Sutcliffe is a good example... Seaman always showed up at the scene of the crime.
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#49 maryportfuncity

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Posted 19 July 2010 - 10:58 AM

Another arrest. Just an idea, like. How about organising all those arrested for aiding and abetting Moat the Hero and forming a football team to play a series of three matches against the police? Sky, BBC and ITV getting one match each. Might generate a few quid for charity, or summat.
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#50 themaninblack

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Posted 19 July 2010 - 05:08 PM

Another arrest. Just an idea, like. How about organising all those arrested for aiding and abetting Moat the Hero and forming a football team to play a series of three matches against the police? Sky, BBC and ITV getting one match each. Might generate a few quid for charity, or summat.



I bet you the police would lose if it was on ITV...
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#51 maryportfuncity

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Posted 28 September 2010 - 03:30 PM

Tasers fired at 'the Hero' were supplied without licence.
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#52 Paul Bearer

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Posted 28 September 2010 - 04:28 PM

Tasers fired at 'the Hero' were supplied without licence.



Hero? He was a fuckin' psychopath.
This is true my form is something odd,
But blaming me is blaming God;
Could I create myself anew
I would not fail in pleasing you.

#53 Memento Mori

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Posted 28 September 2010 - 07:09 PM

Tasers fired at 'the Hero' were supplied without licence.



Hero? He was a fuckin' psychopath.

Gazza might not agree! :P

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#54 maryportfuncity

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Posted 29 September 2010 - 07:53 AM

If he'd managed more good quality fuckin' he'd have been less of a psychopath!

Speaking of - ahem - heroes, Derrick Bird's house is on sale by auction; the tactic being one of avoiding loads of curiousity seekers over the next few months viewing the property. Very low reserve price apparently, so it could be competitively priced in comparison to other modest west Cumbrian dwellings next to main roads.
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#55 Rotten Ali

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Posted 29 September 2010 - 04:52 PM

I've an idea. Someone could buy it and Moat's and turn them into a B&B guest houses called the "The Royale Moathouse" and theme shooting party holidays to the Americans.
Look, three nipples > ...

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#56 Memento Mori

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Posted 01 October 2010 - 05:27 PM

Peter Boatman,the director of operations at the firm which supplied the Tasers used during the stand off with Moat, has apparently committed suicide..

Dust into Dust, and under Dust to lie

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#57 maryportfuncity

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Posted 01 October 2010 - 05:52 PM

Peter Boatman,the director of operations at the firm which supplied the Tasers used during the stand off with Moat, has apparently committed suicide..


Did he use a properly licensed weapon?
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#58 Memento Mori

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Posted 01 October 2010 - 08:14 PM

Peter Boatman,the director of operations at the firm which supplied the Tasers used during the stand off with Moat, has apparently committed suicide..


Did he use a properly licensed weapon?

Hope so - there's bound to be another inquiry if he didn't! :P That psychopathic ginger nut has a lot to answer for!

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#59 themaninblack

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Posted 27 September 2011 - 04:40 PM

No shit, Sherlock...
"I must have killed more men than Cecil B. DeMille."

Gene Wilder as "the Waco Kid", Blazing Saddles (1974)

#60 the_engineer

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Posted 27 September 2011 - 05:04 PM

The guy was clearly a mentalist with a gun (thank you alan partridge for that saying :referee: ) but i don't believe he killed himself . The police probably said this guy is going out in a box and to be fair he killed innocents and he got what he deserved . Really wish the death penalty was reintroduced into the UK i mean we have DNA evidence and everything now not like we would make mistakes and put guilty people to death anymore.

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