125 replies to this topic

[Anubis the Jackal]

With The Tour de France approaching, let us turn our minds to the premature deaths of the competitors, either from falling off an alp , overdose , heart failiure after prolonged EPO abuse, or plain and simple heart blowing up after stuffing yerself full of speed and trying to climb a baking hot mountain. (slightly less spectacular than the Formula One crashes on Youtube, but in its' own way far more heartbreaking.)

So who is the next pedalling chemistry experiment to go? Eric Zabel is my guess, recently coughed to blood-doping and is not a specialist climber, so may find it hard to resist a little 'help' when confronted by a 1 hour climb up a goat track.

[Deadly Doug]

Zabel? Surely not. What about Axel Merckx? I'll wager he's shipped a bit of human growth hormone in his time. And, while on the subject, where is Robert Millar? Someone should write a book about that . . .

[Monoclinic]

Cheating yellow jersey cuts the corner!, forming a cycle stunt display team, watch out for the barriers, pedal power?.

Best part of the Tour de France, for me, is hoping for a collapse of the Pelaton. Yet as these clips will show, accidents on the TdF seem rather dull compared to the F1 crashes people have posted of late.

[Banshees Scream]

For all the weight that runs off a highways road, for the cycler lays a stick in the road.

[harrymcnallysblueandwhitearmy]

Anubis the Jackal, on Jul 1 2007, 01:30 PM, said:

With The Tour de France approaching, let us turn our minds to the premature deaths of the competitors, either from falling off an alp , overdose , heart failiure after prolonged EPO abuse, or plain and simple heart blowing up after stuffing yerself full of speed and trying to climb a baking hot mountain.

Not forgetting tangling with motor vehicles , trees or dogs, catching malaria or trying to off yourself.

As referenced in Monoclinic's post, Abdoujapov's crash is a pearler but is matched in TdF infamy by the 1994 pile-up involving Nelissen, Jalabert, Fontanelli, Gontchenkov and an ill-advised French copper, which I sadly can't find a video of.


For my money, Kazakhstan's second most famous citizen Alex Vinokourov is the likely winner of the this year's Tour (drugs disqualifications permitting) and the spread bet on total deaths I'd offer at 0-0.5.

[maryportfuncity]

Tour De Farce article on the widespread use of drugs, fingers every recent winner bar Lance Armstrong as a deffo cheat and more or less fingers one single-bollocked speed machine for the same.

[DevonDeathTrip]

Drugs or no drugs, I always admired Tyler Hamilton for completing the Tour De France after breaking his collar bone on the first stage, he won a stage and finished fourth overall. Painkillers would not have enhanced his preformance. He lost most of his back teeth as he was grinding them so much. He got banned for EPO abuse in the end.

Cyclists are a strange lot. The vanishing act of Robert Millar has already been mentioned. Charlie Gaul who won the 1958 Tour De France (the same year Chales De Gaulle came to power) was also a bit of a loner, Wiki sums up his retirement as follows:

Quote

"He spent six months running a café near the main train station in the centre of Luxembourg city then slipped out of public view. For a quarter of a century his whereabouts were practically unknown. He was discovered in the middle of the Ardennes forest, following a hermitic lifestyle in a small hut."

Before he took up cycling, he worked as a slaughterman.

I was raised in the same Devon parish as the cycling journalist, William Fotheringam. I remember his bike overtaking our school bus going up a hill once.

[Lord Fellatio Nelson]

Wouldnt it be fair to say that the Tour De Farce has more to do with which Lab has got the upper hand than down to individual Cyclists/Teams?
As with Athletics, the chances of a completely drugs free contest is zilch.

[Tuber Mirum]

Guest, on Jul 1 2007, 07:23 PM, said:

DevonDeathTrip, on Jul 1 2007, 04:15 PM, said:

For a quarter of a century his whereabouts were practically unknown. He was discovered in the middle of the Ardennes forest, following a hermitic lifestyle in a small hut."

Pretty hard to do in summer as the Ardennes gets over run by the Dutch.

Not necessarily.

One of the best places for a hermit to hide is in a crowd.

[honez]

Notapotato, on Jul 2 2007, 03:26 AM, said:

One of the best places for a hermit to hide is in a crowd.

Shell notwithstanding.

[themaninblack]

I've become very disillusioned with it all...I wouldn't know who to back in case they're a cheat...
Of course the sanctimonius journos turned their noses up untill they realised that this years tour starts in London, so it's coverage galore!

The wheel keeps turning...

[DevonDeathTrip]

Two Australians had a bad time in today's mountain stage of the Tour De France.

Stuart O'Grady fell off during the perilous descent of the Cormet de Roseland, sustaining five broken ribs, three fractured vertebrae and a broken shoulder. On the way down the same Alp, Michael Rogers (a contender for race leader) also had a nasty fall, he carried on despite having dislocated his shoulder, before giving up in agony a few miles later.

[Lord Fellatio Nelson]

DevonDeathTrip, on Jul 15 2007, 09:35 PM, said:

Two Australians had a bad time in today's mountain stage of the Tour De France.

Stuart O'Grady fell off during the perilous descent of the Cormet de Roseland, sustaining five broken ribs, three fractured vertebrae and a broken shoulder. On the way down the same Alp, Michael Rogers (a contender for race leader) also had a nasty fall, he carried on despite having dislocated his shoulder, before giving up in agony a few miles later.

I dont know what all the fuss is about. When I was a boy I used to fall off my bike all the time!!
I was always a mass of grazes and torn jeans, I never moaned about it though.
And the Aussies have the cheek to call us whinging poms!!

[Octopus of Odstock]

DevonDeathTrip, on Jul 15 2007, 09:35 PM, said:

Two Australians had a bad time in today's mountain stage of the Tour De France.

Stuart O'Grady fell off during the perilous descent of the Cormet de Roseland, sustaining five broken ribs, three fractured vertebrae and a broken shoulder. On the way down the same Alp, Michael Rogers (a contender for race leader) also had a nasty fall, he carried on despite having dislocated his shoulder, before giving up in agony a few miles later.

LFN is right. What wimps.

I broke both my legs in a mountain bike descent after hitting a large stone head on at 30 m.p.h.

Being British, I dusted myself down, laughed off wellwisher's concerns, saying that it was a mere graze, and went on to win the mountain bike descent time trial, in record time too. Huzzah! ***



*** Please note that due to OOO's age, certain memories are not entirely a copy of what actually happened.


But I did break my legs on a bike and it bloody hurt. Still does, at times, when the cold gets in. Which, living in Britain, is quite a lot.

[harrymcnallysblueandwhitearmy]

DevonDeathTrip, on Jul 15 2007, 09:35 PM, said:

Two Australians had a bad time in today's mountain stage of the Tour De France.

Stuart O'Grady fell off during the perilous descent of the Cormet de Roseland, sustaining five broken ribs, three fractured vertebrae and a broken shoulder. On the way down the same Alp, Michael Rogers (a contender for race leader) also had a nasty fall, he carried on despite having dislocated his shoulder, before giving up in agony a few miles later.

Drugs or not, I've more respect for pro cyclists than many other so-called sportsmen. F**k me, if I was cycling over vertical mountains I'd want a little pick-me-up myself. Anyway, it was another great Alps stage today and it probably signalled the end of Vinokourov's challenge. Looks like it'll be sorted out between Valverde, Rasmussen, Kloden and Evans in the Pyrenees next week.

And O'Grady's response to his broken bones: "I’ve got about seven weeks to get better, so I’ve told the team: sign me up for the Vuelta a Espana! I’m not wasting the good form I’ve got... a few broken ribs shouldn’t slow me down for too long."
I guess that's Aussies for you...

Finally, here's Bouncer causing a few problems today. They must make wheels out of paper these days.

[Octopus of Odstock]

L'ancien Champion Jean Stablinski est décédé

Ooh la la.

[harrymcnallysblueandwhitearmy]

harrymcnallysblueandwhitearmy, on Jul 1 2007, 02:58 PM, said:

For my money, Kazakhstan's second most famous citizen Alex Vinokourov is the likely winner of the this year's Tour (drugs disqualifications permitting) and the spread bet on total deaths I'd offer at 0-0.5.

Well, I got some part of that right at least.

[Anubis the Jackal]

Jesus, is the tour ever going to be clean? Now I'm not so naive as to deny that most top-level sport has some degree of performance-enhancing drug problem, but with the Lance Armstrong rumours, the two forfeited tour winners and now this...Christ (obviously) on a bike!

[Harvester Of Souls]

Cycling is terrible for drugs... At the Sydney Olympics, EPO tests were approved. Overnight, Shimano introduced their new triple chain ring for the bikes...

Dirty sportsmen.