Replying to Christmas
Posted 30 December 2013 - 01:15 PM
The Rocking Song
Little Jesus, sweetly sleep, do not stir;
We will lend a coat of fur,
We will rock you, rock you, rock you,
We will rock you, rock you, rock you:
Fur is no longer appropriate wear for small infants, both due to risk of allergy to animal fur, and for ethical reasons.
Therefore faux fur, a nice cellular blanket or perhaps micro-fleece material should be considered a suitable alternative.
Please note, only persons who have been subject to a Criminal Records Bureau check and have enhanced clearance will be permitted to rock baby Jesus. Persons must carry their CRB disclosure with them at all times and be prepared to provide three forms of identification before rocking commences.
Dashing through the snow
In a one horse open sleigh
O'er the fields we go
Laughing all the way
A risk assessment must be...
Posted 28 December 2013 - 11:41 PM
Weirdest present was an anoymous present I received through the post a couple of weeks ago, addressed to me using my proper name, not the one I go by online, and marked 'Not to be opened till Christmas', so I duly obliged and opened it on Christmas Day. When the parcel arrived in mid December my dog was going daft, it crinkled, so I thought it was a surprise present for him, I have doggy friends that have sent him treats and toys in the past so I thought no more of it. On Christmas Day I brought out the mysterious parcel and opened it in front of my mum and brother, lets just say nobody knew Lady Grendel could turn that shade of red, embarrassment went off the scale as I unwrapped a dildo
Posted 26 December 2013 - 01:27 PM
Posted 25 December 2013 - 08:32 PM
Posted 25 December 2013 - 04:38 PM
I hope your all having a good one where ever you all are!
Posted 25 December 2013 - 04:17 PM
I just finished my roast dinner and can't hardly move. I have lamb because it's my favourite and i don't like turkey , blasphemy I know!!
Posted 25 December 2013 - 04:08 PM
Posted 25 December 2013 - 03:52 PM
Posted 25 December 2013 - 02:32 PM
Posted 25 December 2013 - 03:14 AM
As far as the deathlist is concerned here is a gift for your enjoyment, from Australia.